Benign

I love that word,,,,good news today, our daughters biopsy came back BENIGN.....that is a good word is it not?  Thank you God....you answered our prayers....Happy dance, Happy smile, happy laugh..HAPPY HEART....

yuck

just blowing off steam...this November has not been all good but then neither has it been all bad, I went into a mild depression and when I realized what it was that was dragging me down I had to give myself a good talking to. When you give birth to a child you pray and wish nothing but the best for that child, you try your best in raising this child to be a good person. When this child grows up and takes the wrong direction you beat yourself up trying to figure out what went wrong. You try to fix your child, you give and give and give, you take abuse, you make excuses for the way things happen, you walk on egg shells trying not to upset this child of your heart.  Well after all this time I have now come to the understanding that I am not responsibile for the choices an adult child makes, you guide, you let go, you let the child succeed or fail, you step back and try not to interfer, you stay in the background and if and when this child needs you, or wants you then you can step up. This I have done time after time. I am now done. I love this child with all my heart but I don't like or maybe its disapointment or maybe is it just being tired of being kicked aside and blamed for all of this childs problems because this child cannot or will not take responsilbity for their own problems. I don't have answers, I cannot let this bring me down, I have to understand that this child has made her own choices and has decided to cut us off so, I am not going to dwell on this after this posting. I just needed to let off my frustrations. That was problem number 1.

Problem number 2, my baby girl is having to go through the worries and gut wrenching waiting game for her biopsy, they found 5 lumps and a cluster in her breast, she went in for s simple aspiration biopsy but no fluid was found so she had to go through the cutting biopsy. Now we play the waiting game.  29 years ago I went through the same thing and what makes this really hit home it at the same time frame that I did this, I had my biopsy and right after we left for San Diego for Christmas...I truly put it out of my mind, I was in such denial. When I got back to work after a week the DR. office called me and gave me my results over the telephone. 29 years ago cancer was a death notice, so much has advanced since then that if and I say if her biopsy comes back positive I am so sure all will be a good outcome and she will be just fine and I will go to be with her if it comes to that.  But we are all praying that the biopsy will come back negative.

Problem number 3...My daughter has wonderful in laws and they are now going through the forgetting time of their lives, her fil had a heart attack this week and he is not doing so well, so we are praying for him and her mil.

Problem number 4...oh...there isn't one, well that is a blessing. Today is the last day of November tomorrow is a new month and a new begining so I am letting go of the negatives and will focus on the positives.

I do have so many blessings that out weigh the not so good things, I know they come around every now and then to give me a wake up call as to how good my life really is and the not so good things are just a bump in the road which I have to plow away and take the bumps away.

that is my ranting now I give thanks for my children, my grandchildren and great grandchildren and most of all my husband, who is my life, my best friend and I love him with all my heart.

31 years ago

31 years ago our 3rd daughter was married, she was 17 and her husband to be was almost 19, in fact he had his birthday 3 days after their wedding.  31 years ago I would not have given them a plugged nickle of surviving, they came from very different backgrounds and her husband had not yet learned how to control his anger and would come to the house and go and sit in a corner sulking so I thought at that time. Now here it is 31 years later and I need salt and pepper to flavor my thoughts of that time and I have to eat my words.  31 years have fled by and they are still partners in every sense and they have and are raising 10 beautiful children. I truly adore and respect our son in law, they have been through it all and they are still best friends, lovers, husband and wife, soulmates. They can confide in each other and rely on each other to be there for what ever the situation may call for. I am extremely proud of the family they are.  Happy Anniversary to my daughter and her husband, I am very proud of you both.

whirl wind week

what a week it was, first Julia comes from Alaska a day early to surprise us all, the was really sad that she could not bring the kids with her, it was her first time to travel alone. My precious grandson Michael went home and he bought 3 tickets for the kids to fly out unknown to us, On Saturday Julia and I headed out to Carson City to go to the Farmers Market and we were to meet up with Maura at 1 p.m. for lunch, (she said she had to go to a graduation and that was why she could not go with us), after walking all over downtown Carson Julia and I headed to the mall to kill time until Maura and Michael hooked up with us for lunch, besides the mall was airconditioned and Julia was roasting. Anyway, Maura texted me to let us know they were at the resturant waiting for us so we went to meet up with them, we walked in and they were sitting at the far wall facing the entrance so we just went right over to the table and of course they sat themselves so we had our backs to the door.  Michael was sorta looking behind Julia and having a little smile on his face, Julia thought oh there must be a cutie sitting over there and Michael is flirting, so she did a little turn like she was checking her backpack and yes there was a cutie, 3 cuties, 2 girls and 1 boy, talk about suprise, we sure were, the graduation turned out to be a trip to the airport. From there it has been go go go, we bbq on Sunday  at Maura's house, she had Elizabeth and boys, Meagan and Ve, Matt and Vanessa, the kids stayed over at her house, and Julia stayed with us, Marina and kids were heading back from Los Angeles from Alexander and Keith's Westminister Choir so they did not join us on Sunday, on Monday we bbq at my house and Marina and family, Maura and family, Julia and family, Emmet and Et and ourselves were all here, what fun.  Tues was Maura's birthday and we all went to Compadres for dinner, there was 25 of us, all family. On Wed, 4th of July, we were all up at Virginia City for the whole day, Thursday we went to Reno shopping and had lunch with Maura and girls, Marina, and shopped some more, Friday Julia and kids had to pack to head back to Alaska. What whirl wind week. wish we could have had more time just to relax and sit and enjoy Julia and kids company, maybe next time.

out of the mouths of babes

at our 4th of July family picnic one of our great granddaughters came up to me and asked a question, "how does the food get into the mommies boobies" I looked at her and I said " I think you need to ask your Mommie" her reply was "were you not ever a Mommie?"  Then awhile later the same great granddaughter turned to me and asked " why did that lady say omg, I said to her that it was not polite to listen to another person's conversation but I told her that she meant oh my goodness, she tells me her sister said it meant a bad word. So I carefully explained to her that it could mean something else but I was sure she meant it to be oh my gosh.....gotta love the young ones. 

enlarging the family

today is a good day, I have been telling everyone that there is a new baby coming to this family but everyone was saying not me, well,,,,I was right, there is a new baby due the first part of Feb, our granddaughter Meagan is expecting baby number 2, VaughEmery just turned 2 in May and she will make a wonderful big sister to the new baby.  We are so excited for them.  yeah.....

Mother's Day 2012

Today was a very good Mother's Day, I heard from all my daughters sending me lots of love and hugs, what more could I ask for. I love my daughters and I am very fortunate to have them. Through thick or thin or ups and downs there is always the love there and they are my blessings.

Book Club Disscussion

Tonight 3/21 was my book club and we were discussing the book The Gifted written by Deborah Andreasen, my fabulous granddaughter, Deborah was the guest speaker at the book club and she was wonderful, so poised and was able to carry the dicussion and you would never know that it was her first time doing this. I am so proud of her. But I have to admit, Abigail stole the show LOL,,,,,she was the best baby and everyone fell in love with her. The feedback from the club was very positive and I think Deborah received some very good information.

feeling happy

Today I was thinking about my family.  I am blessed with 4 beautiful daughters who have given us 20 wonderful granddchildren and the grandchildren have given us 14 great grandchildren. I love them all with all my heart and I am proud of the people they have all became. We all have had our ups and our downs but when the need is there we all gather to help whoever needs it at the moment to get through their trial. I am contented with my life, I have been given a partner in life who loves me and puts up with all of my good and bad days. I in return love and adore him to the nth of life and beyond. We have a great bonding and a great love. Thank you God for my gifts.

reflections sorta

We are in a new year and I must say last year ended on a good note, looking back I made peace with family, added 2 new great grandchildren, saw the adoption of 3 wonderful grandchildren and we moved into our perfect little house. The health of my family is in a good spot, no seriouse illnesses, just the normal day to day things. I have my best friend, husband, the soulmate of my life beside me. I don't have to ask for anything else to make my life the best that it is at this moment.